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How to cope with stress and worry

How To Cope With Stress And Worry

Do you experience any of the following symptoms?

  • Physical and mental Tension
  • Mental and physical Stress
  • Over thinking
  • Over analysing
  • Doubt
  • Lack of joy and happiness
  • Anxiety
  • Fear
  • Indecisiveness
  • Unsettled
  • Insomnia or disturbed sleep
  • Inability to switch of or control your thinking and negative thoughts
  • Wired and tired
  • Fatigue, tiredness
  • Inability to function under pressure
  • Anger
  • Depression
  • Sadness
  • Frustration
  • Irritability

Worry is a symptom of fear of the unknown. Our mind and our ego like to anchor itself into the known. Fear is a dominant human emotion, most of our thoughts and actions are induced by it. We actually spend our whole lives trying to cope with fear and remedy ourselves against it. Depending on how we react to our fears, they can motivate or immobilise us.

Worry is the inability to trust in the “goodness” of life. There is a belief that things will turn out negative and not positive. This is a learnt belief from society and conditioning from parents, schooling, institutions and religions. The truth is we do not know how things will turn out in the future. By worrying about it we are living in the future, anticipating and making up stories of how things will turn out. Digging up negative events and unresolved emotions and feelings from the past, living through our minds.

We are also taught and conditioned to judge that things are good or bad. We judge everything from people to events and circumstances. By doing this we put ourselves through hell, trying to control our lives so everything turns out “good”. We do this to avoid the negative feelings and emotions that are a product of our own judgements and negative beliefs in the first place.

In doing all this thinking, analysing, judging and trying to work stuff out in our heads we are missing out on the moment, the pure and simple joy of being alive and breathing. We miss out on the wonder and awe of being human and living and loving and being our true selves.

Worry displaces you, it ungrounds you and denies you living in the now. It leaks energy from you. It causes tension as you can’t let go, it doesn’t allow for joy or happiness. The thing is, is that there will always be uncertainty, we cannot predict tomorrow and we can never have control over it. It is a natural part of life. This may make you feel uncomfortable because of your learnt conditioning and inherent fear from your inability to trust in life and yourself.

The thing is, is that if we really trust ourselves we will know we can handle anything that is thrown at us, “good” or “bad” it doesn’t matter. What we often forget is that the pain of worrying about “bad” things happening in the future is more painful than the event itself. By imagining and worrying about it you are putting yourself through endless pain and suffering over and over and over again. It is the same about reliving a past painful event in your mind. The event has been and gone, but by living it through your mind you keep it alive and it continues to cause you pain, suffering and stops you from feeling joy.

So how do we remedy this??

The first step is awareness. Become aware of your thought patterns and reactions. This puts you in a place of empowerment, to understand and rationalise your thoughts to prevent the negative emotions controlling your life.

Secondly we need learn to control our mind and pull the reins on our thinking. Mediation is the best means to do this. And I know what the negative thoughts are are coming up in your head as you read this, I have heard it so many times in my practice, “meditation is not for me”, well actually you’re the ones that need it the most, don’t give up, it is like learning anything in life, it takes time and dedication. Keep practicing……

Affirmations or positive statements that may help

“I vow to let go of all worries and anxiety in order to be light and free”

“I release my attachment to control and it is easy to breathe”

“I have trust in myself and in life”

Engage in activity to get you present in the now and in your body eg exercise, stretching, deep breathing, gardening, movement, dancing, yoga, drawing etc

Express your fears, ask yourself what is truly causing your anxiety. Run through F.E.A.R= False, Evidence, Appearing, Real. Talk to friends, professionals, write in a journal, and express your fears through art, movement, exercise. The energy of fear needs release and movement.

Meditation gives your mind a break from clutter, helps focus, gives control of mind and uncontrollable thoughts and gives clarity and joy


Change your perspective, energy flows where you give it attention, focus on the positive rather than the negative. Then being positive will create more positive outcomes. Try using the affirmations as mantras.

Have gratitude, write a list of all the things you are grateful for, if it’s not a very big list then here are some ideas to help, having two arms, having two legs, being able to walk, being able to read, having food in the fridge, having a fridge…

Relax and be still- Modern life is a constant state of flux, jumping to the next thing that needs to be done. Set aside time to relax. Being in a state of constant “doing” is unhealthy and unnatural. Often we get addicted to “doing” to avoid slowing down and stopping as we are too scared to face our fears. Constantly “doing” is a distraction from life and living in the moment. Learn to enjoy doing nothing and know that is ok to do that.

Surround yourself with nature- walk in the park, a trip to the beach, sit in your garden, listen to the birds, star gaze, watch the clouds, and walk barefoot on the earth. This not only helps get you present in the moment and the now, and is a form of meditation, but it also recharges your “batteries” and cleanses your mind.

Engage in simple, pleasurable things that you enjoy- playing with your pet, reading a good book, watching the football, going to an art exhibition, having a hot bath.

Laugh and smile- even if you have to fake it, it helps

Diet and Hydration- Dehydration and an unbalanced diet have negative effects on mood, energy and mental health. As does alcohol and drugs which often suppress your uncomfortable feelings driving your fears and anxieties deeper.

Get help- from professionals and or friends, we all experience fear and we are all here to learn and help one another.

Don’t be a prisoner to your own fears. Give the above tips a go. Let your light and love shine and don’t miss out on truly living and experiencing the true joys and wonder of your life.

“Who reminds you to breathe and to beat your heart? Something is there, taking care…..” (Mooji)